Uber Everywhere

Since moving to California I've had my fair share of new experiences. Some have been exciting, some have been lessons learned the hard way, and others have just been downright entertaining in their own unique ways.
After sharing details with a friend about my very first solo Uber ride last night I realized it would probably be a good story to document for when I need a laugh later on.
It all started when my housemate made plans for us to go out to Keegan's (local bar/lounge) last night. I had gotten up at 4:30am that morning to hit the gym before work and by the time it was time to get ready to go to Keegan's I was feeling pretty exhausted, but I dragged myself into the shower and forced myself to get ready despite the onset of dark circles under my eyes. By the time we arrived at Keegan's I was trying my hardest to hold back a continuous cycle of yawns, with the only thing keeping me awake was the... uhm... scenery. Just kidding. Kind of.
By about midnight the girls I was with made their way to the dance floor and I made my way to the outdoor bar were I could sit and chill and avoid all eye contact with other humans. By this time I was downright sleepy and trying my hardest to keep my eyelids open. I contemplated walking over to the outdoor couches on the patio and taking a nap next to the fireplace but feared I would:
1. Get kicked out for 'passing out'
2. Start drooling
OR
3. Experience a falling dream in front of everyone on the patio and have it be mistaken for a seizure and be whisked away in an ambulance against my own will

So instead by 12:30 I had decided to catch myself an Uber home to be reunited with my [rock hard, terribly uncomfortable] bed.
 It was my first time ever ordering my own Uber; I had downloaded the app years ago but could never get it to work. I decided to try my luck and I re-downloaded it, which is when I discovered I had entered my credit card number wrong all those years ago and that's why it had never worked for me -__-
Anyway, I ordered my Uber and made my way outside to wait for Leonardo in the White Honda Accord who was 5 minutes away.
 I had taken a few Uber rides before but never unaccompanied, so this was new territory. When he pulled up outside of Keegan's I hopped in the backseat (and then questioned whether I was supposed to sit in the front?? Not really sure how this all works). He asked me how my night was and was curious as to what Keegan's was like since he had never been before. We began talking and he asked me if I had taken shots to which I replied that no, I didn't, because I can't consume alcohol. He then inquired as to why not, and I told him that I am allergic--in reality I actually am alcohol intolerant but I tell strangers/people in passing that it's an allergy because it's easier for people to accept an allergy than an intolerance.
(PSA: Having a low tolerance and being intolerant are two completely different things, so please don't suggest that I 'just build up my tolerance')
Okay, back to the story... he was shocked and gave me his sincerest condolences regarding my condition and then proceeded to ask if I would like to smoke some cannabis on the ride home. I politely declined and the conversation shifted from drugs and alcohol to past Uber experiences. Unfortunately for me, he didn't have any horror stories, and unfortunately for him, I had very limited past experiences with none of them being very memorable. We discussed how he usually drives in DTLA and he asked me what my hobbies were [literally my most dreaded question... can we not discuss how bland of a life I lead, please?], I went with the easy cop-out of saying I had just recently relocated here so I am still doing a lot of exploring and how there's just so so so much to do/see around Los Angeles... not a complete lie but I also didn't *just* move here.
He also felt the need to mention he had to pass a background check to become an Uber driver. At the time I wasn't sure why he felt the need to add that part in, was that supposed to comfort me? because the fact he mentioned it made me feel a little uneasy if anything.
So here's where the story gets good... we are about 3 minutes from the house and he asks me what my zodiac sign is. I tell him i'm a Cancer and he informs me he's a Scorpio. After I stay quiet he goes 'does that mean anything to you?' I laugh and respond 'nothing at all. I read my horoscope on occasion but that's it' (... and it's for shits and gigs. I get excited when it happens to coincide with my current life predicaments but that's about the extent of philosophy that I place on the stars and planets aligning in [or not in] my favor). He continues to talk about it for a minute or two and by this time we are pulling up to my crib (his words, not mine). When he comes to a stop in front of the house he immediately unbuckles his seat belt. I instantly understand what this means... he's going to get out of the car and open the door for me. So I frantically try to open the car door before that can happen... but he has it locked. I try to play it off like
*haha* 'looks like i'm locked in!'
'Yeah, let me get that for you' and he's climbing out of the car before I can say anything else. He then opens  my door and goes to grab my hand to assist me out. The whole time i'm thinking- NO HOMIE, I GOT THIS- but instead I reluctantly give him my hand because really what else was I supposed to do?
So then... 
He continues to hold my hand for longer than necessary and tries to TWIRL ME AROUND IN A CIRCLE while saying 'So uh I actually wanted to uh see how you look...'
I awkwardly laugh and say 'no, no, no' and retract my hand from his and scurry off to the front gate as he is still trying to talk to me from the road.
The absolute best part is that he was over a foot shorter than me. Like honestly should have let him try to twirl me around because i'm pretty sure that wouldn't have logistically worked out in his favor.

Before last night, I have no idea Uber provided more than just a ride from Point A to Point B. But after my first solo experience I've learned about some of the other services it provides, including:
-drugs at your convenience
-a quick rundown on zodiac signs/compatibility
-a late night dance session in the middle of the street
and
-unsolicited compliments

So if you guys haven't yet experienced the greatness that Uber is, you should probably download it and use my code (kailak5)!

Stay Safe,

xo. Kaila

Growth.

April. I've never really liked the month honestly. Cloudy. Rainy. But April showers are supposed to bring May flowers, right?

April, April, April.
This April I experienced a surge of problems all at once. I felt that life wasn't just picking a battle with me; it had started a full-fledged war with me. The cards just simply weren't being dealt in my favor. Relationship gone wrong, unemployment depression, second guessing if my decision to move across the country was the right one...

When things started getting tough I decided to add some fuel to the already blazing fire. I revisited a piece of my past that I had kept safely tucked away for over two and a half years. A boy, of course. I figured what the heck no better time than now to face the past. I had always had this hunch that he would be married and have a child by now. I thought the news would devastate me, which is part of the reason why I steered clear for so long. Long story short, he does have a child and although he's not married yet, he may as well be. I remember thinking that once this feeling in my gut was confirmed it would shatter me.
But guess what? It didn't.

Don't get my wrong, I cried. I cried from the combination of everything going on and the different emotions I was having to work through. I can't deny that. But I had always been worried that once I truly realized what his news meant it would feel like I was run over by a bus or hit by a train.
 But what it actually did was show me how much I have grown and healed over the years. I didn't give myself enough credit. I'm not trying to boast, but let me tell you I am damn proud of how far I have come.

Don't get me wrong, I miss the connection we used to have. All those years ago, if I could have put the romantic feelings aside we would have been an unstoppable team, when it came to friendship we were the perfect pairing. But life had other plans for us... other lessons to teach us.

The past 2.5 years weren't spent sulking around, waiting for him to show up (although maybe this was always in the back of my mind). No, I had finally decided that I needed to get on with my life and give up that unrealistic love story I had played over and over in my head for so long (damn you, first love). I moved on, was okay with being single, and when I least expected it (so cliche, but so true) someone else came into my life. Spoiler alert: It was only temporarily. Anyway, I guess without realizing it at the time, time and people were healing me.

I'm not resentful. I could never hate him even if I wanted to. I'm proud of his accomplishments and I can honestly say that I am happy for him. I am happy that he has built a life that he enjoys and can be proud of, and that he is at a good place in his life. No hard feelings... ever. First loves are just tricky little things. I will continue to care about him and hope that he is doing okay, I just have to care from a distance. At the end of the day, it is me that I have to continue to protect and care about first and foremost.

I have been blessed with so many wonderful people in my life that have shown me love and support through every bad day and heartache; of course they were there again for me this time around.
In April I faced situations that I never knew I had the strength of getting through. Situations I never knew I had already gotten through.
I am thankful for the new relationships and the old relationships, for the things I have learned by being unemployed, for new living environments and for all the lessons that life continues to teach me through these different situations. I'm thankful for the strength and ability to face both the past and the present, knowing that I will make it out ever stronger and more knowledgeable.

But I would be lying if I said I wasn't glad that April is over. & let me tell you... May was full of those figurative flowers! After all, it can only rain for so long :)


xo. Kaila


[[Edit: I ran across this article on Thought Catalog (<--click me) and connected with it so deeply. I felt this way consistently for so long. I still have these thoughts/emotions every now and again and it's comforting to know that I am not alone, and have never been, in experiencing these feelings.]]

Driving for Dummies: L.A. Edition

Before coming to California I was pretty nervous about driving in/around LA. As I was driving through California with my dad at the beginning of last month I got so excited when we hit a more congested part of the freeway. I was like 'yes!! I can totally do this whole LA driving thing, it's not too bad!'... what I soon learned was that I was out near Riverside- still quite a ways away from LA. As we got closer and closer more cars (and lanes and freeways and exits) started to appear. I was still pretty impressed with my driving for it being my first time in that environment, but I knew I still had a lot to experience.

First off, can I just tell you about how grateful I am for GPS on my phone... I would never be able to survive without it. I have no idea how people navigated around SoCal before GPS (especially if you weren't born and raised here). There are a trillion freeways and they are constantly joining and separating from each other. Oh, & they're referred to as freeways, not highways, interstates, expressways, tollways (thank god there's no tolls). To name a few freeways there's the 405, the 5, the 605, the 105, the 101, the 10, the 110, the 710 and about 358 other ones (always, always, always put 'the' in front of the #). Then there's the streets that no matter whether you go North, South, East, or West they somehow run through every single city in the area- Sepulveda, Figueroa, Crenshaw, Artesia, Western, Rosecrans, Imperial, Slauson. Okay these all most run either East/West or North/South, but I still haven't figured it all out.

I know the Chicagoland area also has many highways but I rarely had to take any and when I did it was either 55 or 88 and 9 times out of 10 when I traveled into the city I took the train, so living amidst them all is making for quite the driving experience. One thing I can definitely appreciate is that LA calls its freeways by their # and not by multiple names- I could never keep The Dan Ryan, The Kennedy, and The Edens Expressways straight.

So anyway, I was beginning to feel pretty confident in my driving abilities. Last weekend I drove into LA to see my little cousin from Seattle perform in a gymnastics meet at the LA Convention Center. Traffic was super light- I was driving in at 7am on a Saturday...  and luckily enough my exit dropped me off smack dab in front of the Convention Center. When I was heading home around 1:30pm I plugged in my destination on my phone and was feeling super good about life. You know that overwhelming feeling of happiness when you feel like you've got your life under control? That's how I was feeling. I was sitting at a red light with the freeway entrance ramp off to the left just past the intersection. I was in the lane I was supposed to be, had my J.Cole CD playing and was thinking to myself 'I can do this! I am truly getting a hang of LA driving, and I'm not too shabby at it either!' (I kid you not, this is literally what I was thinking as I sat at that red light) Then the light turned green... and for some reason the car in the lane next to me was in no hurry to start moving forward but I was like alright whatever, I'm going. When I was about halfway through the intersection I caught sight of the undercover cop car coming up the adjacent street with its lights flashing... Oops. Thank god he was going super slow so I was able to get through the intersection without creating too big of a commotion. I honestly have no idea how the other cars knew he was coming... the streetlight didn't have that special flashing light like they do back home & my music wasn't even loud because I was too busy concentrating on the directions. Anyway, thankfully wherever the police officer was going was much more important then the fact that I went through the intersection. So then, I take the ramp onto the freeway and i'm in the FasTrak lane! (Friends from the Midwest- the FasTrak lane is a lane you can pay to use- you have a console on your windshield much like the iPass and you can pay to use this special lane to get from one place to the next faster) I couldn't merge into the regular traffic lanes because I would have had to cross double solid lines and all the cars coming up behind me wanted to go fast... so there I am in the FasTrak without a FasTrak console... Oops. Then all the sudden the FasTrak lanes split completely from the rest of the lanes and we are on our own two-lane freeway!...Eek. A minute or two later we meet back up with the rest of the lanes of traffic and fiiiinally the white lines are now broken & I can merge with all the cars taking the SlowTrak...lol.
So, to summarize: My confidence went from 100 to 0 real quick.
Thankfully, I made it home in one piece, no tickets... yet (anyone know what happens when you use the FasTrak on accident?).

When these types of things happen I just hope that people see my Illinois license plate and forgive me because after all, i'm probably only used to driving down dirt roads alongside cornfields, right?? ;)

All in all, I've learned a few things:
1. When you need to merge, sometimes you just gotta close your eyes and do it (jk, don't close your eyes)
2. There's a direct correlation between expensive cars and asshole drivers
3. I'll forever envy the motorcyclists that get to move more than 10 mph at any given time
4. PCH provides you with some fantastic views
& 5. People like to give you an estimate on how long it takes to get from Point A to Point B "without traffic" (it baffles me that they even know how long it takes without traffic because there's always traffic..??)

xxoo,
Kaila

Moving (across) Mountains

5 and a half years ago, I was starting my sophomore year of college. In California. I was granted this life changing opportunity through the National Student Exchange Program which I applied to during my freshman year at Illinois State University. Over the course of the academic year I fell in love with Southern California, but unfortunately the program was only a one year opportunity, so a week after classes ended in May I was headed home to Illinois. I returned to Illinois State University for my junior and senior years and before I knew it I had student loans to pay back (those student loans… lovely, aren’t they?). Luckily, I had a job (and parents that didn’t charge me rent) that allowed me to afford my monthly loan payments while also being able to save money. Two years after graduation, which brings us to Summer 2015, almost all of my hometown friends had pursued jobs, opportunities, or further education outside of the Southwest suburbs (Washington, D.C., North Carolina, San Francisco- to name a few). I found it kind of ironic because my friends and I always believed I would be one the first ones to leave the state post-graduation. Everyone knew how in love I was with the West Coast, and I had already lived across the country for a year before, so it was thought that I would venture West before too long.

But… there I was, 2+ years later, still in the Midwest going through the motions of daily life. To clarify, I wasn’t unhappy… but I knew I wanted something different, something more. The idea of moving to California surfaced again in early summer and I sketched out a plan of how I would pursue it once I returned from my trip to Jamaica in late July. I was going to spend my evenings and weekends at the library, rigorously applying to jobs & gosh darn it, I was going to be in California by October. My mind was made and my heart was ready. Or so I thought.

I returned from paradise, and shortly thereafter my job transferred me to a different office location. My commute home was, on average, an hour long. I’m not complaining, as I know so many people commute just as far, if not farther. But let me tell you… once you get home, change out of your work clothes, and eat dinner, the last thing you want to do is get back in your car and go to the library to stare at a computer screen after you did just that for 8 hours at work. So, needless to say, that didn’t happen too often. I’m sure I could have been more dedicated, but hey, I was pretty dedicated to that 9pm bedtime too.

All of the sudden, it’s October. I’m distracted by the Cubs advancing through the playoffs and the leaves on the trees changing color. Not much (okay, any) applying is going on, but I’m also not enjoying the new office at work too much either. The end of October rolls around and around Halloween I get the crazy idea to just stop, drop everything, & roll out to the West Coast. This thought hadn’t really crossed my mind before because I really wanted to have a job lined up before moving across the country but I was beginning to realize that this wasn’t going to happen. I consulted with my family, which was terrifying because I was scared to face their reactions. My sister and both of my parents all gave me variations of ‘I was thinking the same thing’. WHAT. A. RELIEF. Of course I wanted to pack the car and head out right then and there, but my parents convinced me that waiting until after the holidays would be best.

Even though I knew that California was what I wanted, my heart was split into two. I struggled with the idea of leaving my 3 precious nephews along with the rest of my family. If a genie would have popped up out of nowhere and granted me one wish, you better believe it would have been to have my family come along with me, hands down. I’ll skip the details of the goodbyes to spare myself from shedding any tears, but I will say that over those last few weeks in Illinois I was reminded of how many amazing people I have in my life. Although we may have thousands of miles between us now, their love and support continues to surround me.

My parents and I agreed on a departure date of January 4^th. My Dad agreed to be my travel buddy (with no complaints, even though he would be spending his birthday on the road) and my Mom gifted me her car for this next chapter of my life. Yes, I am so spoiled, & yes, I have the best parents on planet Earth. I can’t even begin to express how thankful I am for everything they have done for me and most importantly all the support and love they have for me.

With that being said, I packed up my room, and loaded up the SUV. The morning of January 4^th, my Dad and I set out at about 5:30am. On the first day we drove past ISU (so strange to drive past the exit that had been the destination for so many years), right through St. Louis (mad at myself for never visiting this city when I lived so close), up and down the hills of Missouri, and before we knew it we were entering and then exiting Oklahoma, and ending our first leg of the trip in Amarillo, Texas.

I was so fascinated by the fact that each state we passed through had its own characteristics that made it unique from the last one and the next one.

Illinois—well, flat.

Missouri—It started to get a little hilly and the limestone that ran along patches of the interstate made for good scenery.

Oklahoma—Cows and horses roaming in pastures, very green grass, mixture of hilly and flat. We drove through both Tulsa and Oklahoma City… they both had that small city feel that I found really appealing. Traffic wasn’t horrendous (& we even passed through OKC during evening rush hour); it still had the ‘city feel’ without too much chaos.

Texas—By the time we entered Texas it was dark out, so I couldn’t see much of what we were passing. The only memorable thing from Texas that night was passing their rest stops that were lit up like the Texas Flag and how you couldn’t go very far without seeing a billboard, advertisement, etc. that read ‘The Lone Star State’. The next morning at the hotel, the continental breakfast included waffles in the shape of Texas. So in conclusion, Texas really loves Texas. The morning of Day 2, we were able to see more of the Texas scenery. It included a lot of cattle ranches and we even passed a slaughterhouse or two (so heartbreaking--yes, I eat meat, but still heartbreaking).

New Mexico—NM was so butte (get it, get it??? Like beaut[iful]). They were actually plateaus but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity for that pun. We passed through Albuquerque and drove through mountains with light rain/snow. Towards the end of the New Mexico stretch the skies opened up to a gorgeous blue with puffy white clouds and pretty red/orange plateaus off in the distance.

Arizona—Our destination for Day 2 was my Grandma’s house in Sun City West, AZ. We decided to stay two nights in Arizona to be able to spend time with Grandma and also pad our traveling schedule with an extra day in case of bad weather or any other unforeseen problems. Arizona was mountains and desert, nothing too thrilling at first. Then we stopped for gas and switched drivers (I had been driving). About 20 minutes after departing the gas station we entered a really mountainous area near Flagstaff that had a lot of downhill, twisty, high speed sections. Of course by this time it was dark and foggy, down pouring, with semis everywhere. It was a pretty terrifying couple of hours but my Dad was a trooper and got us through it safely. Thankfully, this was the only ‘bad weather’ we encountered in our travels. We made it to Grandma’s house, ate dinner, and played a few rounds of Rummikub (her favorite). The next day we helped her take down the remainder of her Christmas decorations and ran some errands. Thursday morning we went out to breakfast for Dad’s birthday before heading to California.

California—My Dad had me drive the last stretch of the trip from AZ to CA so that I could get a feel for the trip for when I go to visit my Grandma in AZ. It was only 5.5 hours, and a fairly easy drive. We entered sunny California, and our destination was at our fingertips. We were making good progress when the gaslight came on and there was no gas station or exit signs in sight. Thankfully, we came over a hill and TADA there was a sign for a gas station only a couple miles up the road. We filled up the tank and set out for Carson, CA. As we got closer to LA and the highways became more intricate I felt so proud of myself for maneuvering through the “traffic”, only to discover that we were still about an hour out of LA… lol, but fear not… I survived all of it nonetheless.

We arrived in Carson at my friend Jenn’s house where I will be temporarily residing. This adventure wouldn’t have been possible if it weren’t for Jenn and her family opening up their home to me, so for that I am forever grateful. When we arrived her mom and niece were at home, and her brother showed up soon after. Jenn eventually came home from work and we all hung out and ate dinner together- complete with a birthday cake for Dad. I think my Dad felt very reassured that he was leaving me in good hands after spending time with her family.  Friday morning I drove my Dad to the airport and had to say goodbye to the last ‘piece of home’ that I had with me. It was very hard, but I only had a few moments to sulk about it before I was back on the 405 navigating my way back to my new home.

I have been in California for 2.5 weeks now and although I miss my Illinois family and friends a whole bunch, my CA family and friends have made me feel at home and keep me so busy that I barely have time to feel down or sad. Technology is amazing and makes the distance much more tolerable; I love my Saturday morning Skype dates with my nephews J, as well as the phone calls, text messages, postcards, etc. that I have received from friends and family.

[For all the people that know how my first stint in California started 5 and a half years ago- be proud that I have yet to call my mother crying! Haha]

If you would have asked teenage me where I would be at this point in time, I can guarantee my answer would have been far from “California”. When I moved out to Northridge 5.5 years ago it was for a boy & I don’t regret that decision one bit. As crazy as it may have been at the time, it was the best decision I could have ever made.  & if it weren’t for Cal Poly Pomona not participating in the National Student Exchange Program the year I applied, I never would have ended up at my 2^nd choice- Northridge. & if that didn’t happen I wouldn’t be sitting on my laptop right this very second at the Carson Library writing about my travels for you all to read. Oh, how fascinating this thing we call Life is. 

Each and every day we continue to add onto the beautifully intricate webs we are weaving. I am so hopeful and excited for this journey I have just begun and I can’t wait to write about and share more of my experiences and adventures. 

Xoxo 

    Kaila