I haven't written lately (as you can see). It's not that I haven't thought about it, because trust me- I have. It's just that I haven't really had much to say, or maybe not sure how to say it, nor have I had the energy to lug out my laptop (if you've seen my poor laptop you know what I mean).
It's not that nothing has been going on lately, because a lot has been going on. It's more that I don't really know what to say about my life lately. Don't take this the wrong way and read it as a depressing post, that is not what I am trying to portray. I just have been a little stressed and frazzled that I do not know what to feel or what to do. I feel like I am kind of living in a fog right now. There is a lot of uncertainty. Again, this is not necessarily a completely bad thing. I'm still young, i'm not supposed to know all the answers anyway, right?!
Remember a few posts ago when I was dead set on moving to the west coast? Well, reality hit. I'm living paycheck to paycheck it seems, with no chance to save much money. I am not totally writing California off, but maybe just putting a delay on it. Chasing your dreams is important, but making sure you are being responsible and making smart decisions is also important. I try being very responsible with my money, and I would not feel comfortable moving across country at this time.
As for grad school-- I am kind of in a standstill with this one. When choosing programs to apply to I feel that you have to be specific and know what you want to get into. I still am really uncertain with what I want to do, so I feel like applying for grad schools wouldn't be a smart choice at this point. I don't want to apply to a program that I am not passionate about. I don't want to apply just to apply. I think it would smart of me to get more experience out in the field before choosing whether or not I want to spend the money to further my education in a specific area of study.
Anyway, I apologize for this being a fairly boring post. I hope that I can write something more appealing soon. :)
Until then,
xoxo kaila
