Moving (across) Mountains

5 and a half years ago, I was starting my sophomore year of college. In California. I was granted this life changing opportunity through the National Student Exchange Program which I applied to during my freshman year at Illinois State University. Over the course of the academic year I fell in love with Southern California, but unfortunately the program was only a one year opportunity, so a week after classes ended in May I was headed home to Illinois. I returned to Illinois State University for my junior and senior years and before I knew it I had student loans to pay back (those student loans… lovely, aren’t they?). Luckily, I had a job (and parents that didn’t charge me rent) that allowed me to afford my monthly loan payments while also being able to save money. Two years after graduation, which brings us to Summer 2015, almost all of my hometown friends had pursued jobs, opportunities, or further education outside of the Southwest suburbs (Washington, D.C., North Carolina, San Francisco- to name a few). I found it kind of ironic because my friends and I always believed I would be one the first ones to leave the state post-graduation. Everyone knew how in love I was with the West Coast, and I had already lived across the country for a year before, so it was thought that I would venture West before too long.

But… there I was, 2+ years later, still in the Midwest going through the motions of daily life. To clarify, I wasn’t unhappy… but I knew I wanted something different, something more. The idea of moving to California surfaced again in early summer and I sketched out a plan of how I would pursue it once I returned from my trip to Jamaica in late July. I was going to spend my evenings and weekends at the library, rigorously applying to jobs & gosh darn it, I was going to be in California by October. My mind was made and my heart was ready. Or so I thought.

I returned from paradise, and shortly thereafter my job transferred me to a different office location. My commute home was, on average, an hour long. I’m not complaining, as I know so many people commute just as far, if not farther. But let me tell you… once you get home, change out of your work clothes, and eat dinner, the last thing you want to do is get back in your car and go to the library to stare at a computer screen after you did just that for 8 hours at work. So, needless to say, that didn’t happen too often. I’m sure I could have been more dedicated, but hey, I was pretty dedicated to that 9pm bedtime too.

All of the sudden, it’s October. I’m distracted by the Cubs advancing through the playoffs and the leaves on the trees changing color. Not much (okay, any) applying is going on, but I’m also not enjoying the new office at work too much either. The end of October rolls around and around Halloween I get the crazy idea to just stop, drop everything, & roll out to the West Coast. This thought hadn’t really crossed my mind before because I really wanted to have a job lined up before moving across the country but I was beginning to realize that this wasn’t going to happen. I consulted with my family, which was terrifying because I was scared to face their reactions. My sister and both of my parents all gave me variations of ‘I was thinking the same thing’. WHAT. A. RELIEF. Of course I wanted to pack the car and head out right then and there, but my parents convinced me that waiting until after the holidays would be best.

Even though I knew that California was what I wanted, my heart was split into two. I struggled with the idea of leaving my 3 precious nephews along with the rest of my family. If a genie would have popped up out of nowhere and granted me one wish, you better believe it would have been to have my family come along with me, hands down. I’ll skip the details of the goodbyes to spare myself from shedding any tears, but I will say that over those last few weeks in Illinois I was reminded of how many amazing people I have in my life. Although we may have thousands of miles between us now, their love and support continues to surround me.

My parents and I agreed on a departure date of January 4^th. My Dad agreed to be my travel buddy (with no complaints, even though he would be spending his birthday on the road) and my Mom gifted me her car for this next chapter of my life. Yes, I am so spoiled, & yes, I have the best parents on planet Earth. I can’t even begin to express how thankful I am for everything they have done for me and most importantly all the support and love they have for me.

With that being said, I packed up my room, and loaded up the SUV. The morning of January 4^th, my Dad and I set out at about 5:30am. On the first day we drove past ISU (so strange to drive past the exit that had been the destination for so many years), right through St. Louis (mad at myself for never visiting this city when I lived so close), up and down the hills of Missouri, and before we knew it we were entering and then exiting Oklahoma, and ending our first leg of the trip in Amarillo, Texas.

I was so fascinated by the fact that each state we passed through had its own characteristics that made it unique from the last one and the next one.

Illinois—well, flat.

Missouri—It started to get a little hilly and the limestone that ran along patches of the interstate made for good scenery.

Oklahoma—Cows and horses roaming in pastures, very green grass, mixture of hilly and flat. We drove through both Tulsa and Oklahoma City… they both had that small city feel that I found really appealing. Traffic wasn’t horrendous (& we even passed through OKC during evening rush hour); it still had the ‘city feel’ without too much chaos.

Texas—By the time we entered Texas it was dark out, so I couldn’t see much of what we were passing. The only memorable thing from Texas that night was passing their rest stops that were lit up like the Texas Flag and how you couldn’t go very far without seeing a billboard, advertisement, etc. that read ‘The Lone Star State’. The next morning at the hotel, the continental breakfast included waffles in the shape of Texas. So in conclusion, Texas really loves Texas. The morning of Day 2, we were able to see more of the Texas scenery. It included a lot of cattle ranches and we even passed a slaughterhouse or two (so heartbreaking--yes, I eat meat, but still heartbreaking).

New Mexico—NM was so butte (get it, get it??? Like beaut[iful]). They were actually plateaus but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity for that pun. We passed through Albuquerque and drove through mountains with light rain/snow. Towards the end of the New Mexico stretch the skies opened up to a gorgeous blue with puffy white clouds and pretty red/orange plateaus off in the distance.

Arizona—Our destination for Day 2 was my Grandma’s house in Sun City West, AZ. We decided to stay two nights in Arizona to be able to spend time with Grandma and also pad our traveling schedule with an extra day in case of bad weather or any other unforeseen problems. Arizona was mountains and desert, nothing too thrilling at first. Then we stopped for gas and switched drivers (I had been driving). About 20 minutes after departing the gas station we entered a really mountainous area near Flagstaff that had a lot of downhill, twisty, high speed sections. Of course by this time it was dark and foggy, down pouring, with semis everywhere. It was a pretty terrifying couple of hours but my Dad was a trooper and got us through it safely. Thankfully, this was the only ‘bad weather’ we encountered in our travels. We made it to Grandma’s house, ate dinner, and played a few rounds of Rummikub (her favorite). The next day we helped her take down the remainder of her Christmas decorations and ran some errands. Thursday morning we went out to breakfast for Dad’s birthday before heading to California.

California—My Dad had me drive the last stretch of the trip from AZ to CA so that I could get a feel for the trip for when I go to visit my Grandma in AZ. It was only 5.5 hours, and a fairly easy drive. We entered sunny California, and our destination was at our fingertips. We were making good progress when the gaslight came on and there was no gas station or exit signs in sight. Thankfully, we came over a hill and TADA there was a sign for a gas station only a couple miles up the road. We filled up the tank and set out for Carson, CA. As we got closer to LA and the highways became more intricate I felt so proud of myself for maneuvering through the “traffic”, only to discover that we were still about an hour out of LA… lol, but fear not… I survived all of it nonetheless.

We arrived in Carson at my friend Jenn’s house where I will be temporarily residing. This adventure wouldn’t have been possible if it weren’t for Jenn and her family opening up their home to me, so for that I am forever grateful. When we arrived her mom and niece were at home, and her brother showed up soon after. Jenn eventually came home from work and we all hung out and ate dinner together- complete with a birthday cake for Dad. I think my Dad felt very reassured that he was leaving me in good hands after spending time with her family.  Friday morning I drove my Dad to the airport and had to say goodbye to the last ‘piece of home’ that I had with me. It was very hard, but I only had a few moments to sulk about it before I was back on the 405 navigating my way back to my new home.

I have been in California for 2.5 weeks now and although I miss my Illinois family and friends a whole bunch, my CA family and friends have made me feel at home and keep me so busy that I barely have time to feel down or sad. Technology is amazing and makes the distance much more tolerable; I love my Saturday morning Skype dates with my nephews J, as well as the phone calls, text messages, postcards, etc. that I have received from friends and family.

[For all the people that know how my first stint in California started 5 and a half years ago- be proud that I have yet to call my mother crying! Haha]

If you would have asked teenage me where I would be at this point in time, I can guarantee my answer would have been far from “California”. When I moved out to Northridge 5.5 years ago it was for a boy & I don’t regret that decision one bit. As crazy as it may have been at the time, it was the best decision I could have ever made.  & if it weren’t for Cal Poly Pomona not participating in the National Student Exchange Program the year I applied, I never would have ended up at my 2^nd choice- Northridge. & if that didn’t happen I wouldn’t be sitting on my laptop right this very second at the Carson Library writing about my travels for you all to read. Oh, how fascinating this thing we call Life is. 

Each and every day we continue to add onto the beautifully intricate webs we are weaving. I am so hopeful and excited for this journey I have just begun and I can’t wait to write about and share more of my experiences and adventures. 

Xoxo 

    Kaila

Kaila Goes International

I love love love traveling. Luckily for me, I have family and friends sprinkled across the United States, providing me with a lot of opportunities to see and explore new cities and places. This summer was a special one because I finally made it outside of the USA for the first time ever! 

Read about my journey below :]

This past summer I took my first ever transatlantic vacation. Okay, so I don’t know if that is the correct terminology but I thought it sounded cool. So, AKA I hopped on a little jet plane with some of my friends and before I knew it we were landing on an island, unboarding the plane, and being offered marijuana.

OK OK FINE—Here’s the facts:

This July I was lucky enough to travel outside of the country for an unforgettable 6 days & 5 nights.

Unforgettable, people, U N F O R G E T T A B L E .

But first let’s rewind about 13 months prior to take off.

One of my very best friends, Christina, was asked to be the Maid of Honor in her cousin Amanda's destination wedding.

Destination: Jamaica

For a couple years now I’ve tagged along to countless family birthdays, a wedding, 25^th anniversary, etc. with Christina. Over time, I grew to not only know her parents and brothers, but also her aunts and uncles, cousins, and grandma. She has one of those families where you instantly feel at home when you are around them and the hours spent together fly by effortlessly, filled with laughter and good conversation. About a year before the wedding Christina mentioned that I should totally come to Jamaica with them. I thought she was crazy. Then at the next family gathering they were talking about Jamaica and Christina mentioned it again- I was a bit embarrassed because I thought Christina was nuts for suggesting this in the first place and now her whole family was around! BUT THEN, the bride’s mother chimed in and was like ‘You totally should, it will be a blast!’  I remember just replying casually with something like ‘yeah, that would be fun!’ but in my mind I was still thinking –no way, I would feel way too intrusive- (says the girl that crashed another cousins wedding just weeks prior, haha) Long story short, every time I was with Christina and/or her family the conversation always led to Jamaica—can you blame them?!—and I slowly starting warming up to the idea. I was feeling a lot more comfortable with the idea and started viewing it as an actual possibility.

Now, time to fast forward. Winter comes and goes and it’s all of the sudden spring. Time to make an appointment with the local travel agency to book this trip! Oh, and I should probably apply for a passport soon, too. On a sunny Saturday morning I went to my appointment at the travel agency to meet with Karen, who also booked Christina and her parents trips. It was pretty vital that my itinerary matched some of my fellow travelers because the resort was about an hour and a half ride from the airport and I knew I was too much of a baby/inexperienced word traveler to do that on my own. My next stop was the post office where I turned in my passport application to ensure that I would get my passport on time (I received it a few short weeks later- in May- so I had more than enough time)(& as you can see above I even had enough time for a little Passport photo shoot ;]). 

& so the countdown began!

With my all-inclusive resort stay booked and my passport in hand the excitement really began to set it. It was crazy how fast the past year had flown by but we were all so excited to get this vacation underway! The island vibes, teal and turquoise waters, soft sand, and radiant sunshine were only a plane ride away.  

Fast forward again—It’s July 18^th, before sunrise, and I am on my way to Christina’s parents house with my luggage [Christina and her boyfriend, Derek, were already in Jamaica with the bride and groom]. After being dropped off, her dad and brothers load up the car and we head out to her grandma’s house where the bus will pick us up and take us to the airport. There was 13 of us traveling to Midway Airport together from her grandma's house. Once we get to the airport we figure out where we need to go and what we need to do, and before we knew it we were sitting at the gate. Some of the grooms family was already at the gate, ready to get to Jamaica too!

We board the plane, get situated, and prepare for take off. Once the plane leaves American soil I realize how crazy it is that the next time it lands i'll be climbing out and stepping foot on foreign land--- on a Caribbean island! The flight was pretty easy, less than 4 hours.  As we are began our descent into Montego Bay we were able to see the beautiful blues of the ocean which of course made me so excited all over again. Of course other emotions were also flowing through my veins. Like anxiety and worry. I meannnn... we were really close to the water, what if we missed the tarmac and ended up swimming [drowning] alongside the sharks? Obviously that didn't happen because i'm still here now, but in the moment those thoughts pop up without your consent. 

So... in regular flight fashion, we sit there waiting to unboard our plane with much anticipation and restlessness. Eventually we make our way to the front of the plane, and then we are off and making our way through the airport hallways... hallways that were decorated with Ebola signs... but hey, I was officially INTERNATIONAL! 

xoxo, 

   Kaila

{My original intentions were to write all about my Jamaican vacation but in normal Kaila fashion I had to start from the very beginning without leaving out very many details, so be sure to lookout for my next blog post where i'll write all about those 6 nights and 5 days in paradise}

Talking in Circles

The other day I realized how I should probably hire a conversation coach. I have no idea if such a thing exists, but I need to find out.

Why, you ask? because my stories take approximately 3 days to tell. 

If you are my friend, you unfortunately know exactly what I am talking about.  

I just cannot and will not leave out any little detail, even if that means backtracking for the entirety of my story. 

You ask me what my favorite movie is and you walk away knowing that I used to love Hilary Duff (still kinda do, no shame) and how I own nearly all of her movies. Which by the way have you seen her one movie Raise Your Voice?? I really liked that one.. it's not my favorite movie but I love the part where the one girl is playing the violin and then they start singing 'The Way You Do The Things You Do' by The Temptations. Okay so anyway, my favorite movie.. the crazy thing is that my favorite movie takes place in the area of California where I ended up living for a year in college...the San Fernando Valley. In one of the opening scenes of the movie it mentions the infamous Northridge Earthquake.. well, I went to California State University, Northridge! Isn't that crazy? & I didn't realize the connection until after I had moved back to Illinois and was watching the movie one day. I honestly can't believe I hadn't caught the connection way earlier but I guess I didn't watch the movie at all while I was in California. I was too busy doing things like staring at palm trees and going to taco trucks and sitting in traffic on the 405 and trying to get the sand out of my purse. Oh okay, so yea I should probably tell you the name of the movie.. it's A Cinderella Story. Please tell me you've seen it?? The football game scene is to die for. When will I meet my very own Austin Ames?.. The movie always made me want to go to Princeton, because wellllll..... that's where the princes go.
..Oh wait, you want to know how I ended up in California for a year? Okay pull up a chair... and maybe a bed, kitchen, and bathroom too because girl this story takes at least 5-9 months to tell.

[Alright, I really hope if you are reading this you have seen A Cinderella Story and understood everything I was saying.. if not then you need to go do that right now.]

To bring me back to my point, I have such a hard time getting straight to the point when talking. Or even typing.. you should see how many paragraphs I get rid of while writing blog posts. I'll reread the novel I typed and recognize the places where I may have gotten a little too far off track. It pains me to delete what I've written (because of course part of me still thinks it's vital information),but I do it for your guys' sanity.

I'm not sure I quite understand how I still have friends due to this condition that I have. God bless their souls for listening to me and for gently suggesting that I get back to the point or for stopping me a couple sentence into my story and asking 'Wait is this gonna be a Kaila story because I don't have that much time right now'.
Patience is a virtue that most of them most possess [or perhaps they are just really good at zoning out without me noticing?].

So i'm sorry if you were just wondering what I ate for dinner and you end up finding out what socks I wore today, when my birthday is, how my nail polish matched my outfit perfectly yesterday, the fact that my dog ate my bag of Dove chocolate (& survived), and how I sometimes get the urge to turn off the work phones during work hours. I would apologize but that might take awhile too...

If any of you know a solution I would love to discuss it [ha-ha, I am hilarious]

Talking in circles 'til then,

xo.kaila

Recap 2014's 15 by '15

In normal Kaila fashion, I am late once again with this whole blogging thing.
If you remember, I set out to accomplish "15 by '15". If you don't remember, that's okay too, I won't hold it against you... this time.
Anyway, I thought it would be a good idea to revisit my list and let you know whether or not I succeeded or failed.

1. Spend an entire day phoneless.
YEP GUYS, I ALREADY FAILED.
This didn't happen. But can you really blame me? I only had 365 opportunities to achieve this one.

2. Find a new job. 
Hahaha, nope. Better luck this year? Let's hope.

3. Get a passport. 
Guys, I'm on a streak!! It might not be a winning streak, but hey at least i'm being consistent.
--This one will be changing within the next couple months though. I have plans to go to Jamaica in July, but I guess they won't let you on the plane unless you have one of these bad boys... so I'll have to dust off that passport application I picked up a year ago and actually turn it in.

4. Reinvent my wardrobe. 
Yay, finally a victory! I feel like reinvent is a pretty bold word, but I going to go ahead and credit myself with a success here. I definitely bought a lot of clothes over those 12 months, and I think my closet has definitely become more diverse (aka it consists of more than white, black, and 50 shades of grey).

5. Become a Big Sister. 
I'm a Big Sister! I applied and had my interview at Big Brothers Big Sisters back in January and finalllllly got paired with my little mid-October. She is six and she is adorable.

6. Go on a shopping spree. 
Out of all my years of living (and having some type of income), 2014 was definitely the year I spent the most money on myself. In 2014 I went on two trips-- Virginia/DC/Maryland & Santa Barbara/LA. I purchased lots of new clothing for those two trips along with some new threads for work. I bought myself Rosetta Stone. I bought myself new tires (woo!). Maybe these don't make up a traditional 'shopping spree'. But the (majority of) new clothes, Rosetta Stone, and two trips were all within 2 months of each other. I used to have such a difficult time spending money, so buying these things made me feel like a risk taker with an IDGAF attitude towards my bank account.

7. Go on a wintertime vacation. 
Ewwww, after last winter why was this even on my list?! The only place I want to go during the months of November-March is somewhere warm. Give me sunshine and ocean breezes, not snow mounds and icy streets. No but if i'm being honest, a wintertime vacation would be fun to do at least once, but I think I have a few other places with different scenery to visit first (Turks & Caicos, Barbados, Greece, the Carolinas... anyone in??).

8. Redesign my room. 
I did not redesign it in the capacity that I had wanted or planned on. I definitely got rid of a lot, changed out pictures, and took down some things I had hanging on the walls. I'm big on organization so I focused on getting rid of the unneeded things I had laying around. I kept contemplating whether or not I should tackle the project of completely redoing my room though. The thought that frequented my mind most often was 'what if you redo it, and then move out shortly thereafter?' K. Well Kaila, you're still there. -__-   Not too sure where I stand on this topic now. I definitely want to get new bedding and decorations. Maybe I'll have my mom weigh in on the new potential colors, so that way if I move a year from now, she won't want/have to repaint it again. But seriously, who am I kidding.. the only moving I'm ever going to be doing is moving out of my room and into the basement. 2broke4dis

9. Make new friends.
But who needs new friends?

10. Read 15 books.
Yes, yes, yes! I went C-R-A-Z-Y the first 6 weeks of the year. I tore through so many books in such a small amount of time. Then I slowed down quite a bit, but by the end of the year I had read 22 books. I love reading. and I read some pretty great books, so i'm very happy that I set this as one of my goals for the year.

11. Pay more of my loans off than the minimum requirement. 
Yes ma'am. It feels good to know that I am slightly ahead of the ballgame on this one. Butttt with that being said... loans are also the reason that I will be living at my parents house until I'm 40.

12. Plan a trip to somewhere new.
In May I visited one of my closest friends who had previously moved out to Arlington, VA. Her cousin was already going out there, so me and one of our other friends decided to surprise her. I got to visit and see a lot of new things. I had never been to that region of the country before, so it was neat seeing the monuments, White House, Pentagon, the amazing World War II memorial, Atlantic Ocean, the adorable town of Ocean City, Smithsonian National Zoo, etc. I also got two more states closer (Virginia and Maryland) to completing my life bucket list item of visiting all 50 states (still have lots of traveling to do).

13. Build/Create something.
Ta-Da!

14. Explore somewhere new-locally. 
In late July I decided to take up biking. I wanted to get out and do something outside that was physically active but also enjoyable. I hadn't realized how many trails and paths where at my fingertips, just waiting for me to take advantage of them. I am so glad that I started doing this and that I now know some of great options I have right outside my window. I am sooo looking forward for the nicer weather ahead so I can get back out there!
I also went kayaking for the first time in 2014! I went with my friend in a small pond in our neighborhood that is conveniently located across the street from her house. I fell in love with it so much that a couple weeks later I went kayaking again in a larger lake about 40 minutes away from home. It was gorgeous, and kayaking is one of my favorite outdoor activities now. Ughhh, can it be summer yet??

15. Take a class... or two. 
Well.. remember how I got Rosetta Stone? I was really good about using it religiously for the first few weeks. Then I went on vacation and have yet to stay consistent with it again. I want to be able to speak Spanish so bad, so I need to make a habit out of this again. I think that counts as a class, right? I also bought a yoga DVD to try out at home. I was thinking about enrolling in a class, but wanted to try it out in the comfort of my own home before making a complete fool out of myself in front of others. Short story short- i hated it. I think I gave it two chances before passing it on to my sister. I also took a class that trained/prepared me to become an English tutor to an ESL student. I now have a student who I meet with for two hours on Wednesday nights, and it is such a great experience! My student is so incredibly driven and she is doing so well in her ESL classes at the community college. Very proud of her!


In the end, I successfully completed 7 of my 15 by '15 items with another 3 that I am considering successful even though my interpretation of success on these may not meet your criteria. I am glad that I did this mini project last year. Not only did I set out and complete some goals that I wanted to accomplish, but the 15 by '15 list along with blogging allowed me to more easily document and reflect on different experiences, opportunities, and accomplishments that occurred in my life over the year.

Thanks for reading,

xoxo-Kaila

Let Freedom Ring

[^yes, my intention was to get Martina McBride's voice stuck in your head for the rest of the day]

With it being Veteran's Day I thought it would be suiting to blog about Freedom. Freedom comes in many different forms. From the freedom that our soldier's fight for to the freedom that a woman (or man) feels when she(he) finally escapes an unhealthy relationship. It can be the feeling you get when all of your roommates are gone for the weekend or it can be the different rights that we vote to have (or not have) on Election Day. One thing that is common between all of these different versions of freedom is that freedom is good (unless you are scared to be home alone, which in that case, I am sorry).

We don't think about our freedoms on a regular basis because it is so second nature for us to have them. Especially at this age, when I've already gained the freedom that comes with having a drivers license and having the freedom to walk into a bar without a fake license.

It's days like today & 4th of July that really remind me just how lucky I am to have all the freedoms that I do have. It's hard to imagine that there are still people around the world that have little control over what they can wear, say, do, etc.

People are quick to blame the US government for all the bad things that may be occurring, but we so easily forget all of the positive things that the government does provide us with on a daily basis. For instance, there may be problems with the universal healthcare that has been recently put into place, but how amazing it is that our country is trying to give each and every one of us access to healthcare in the first place?

I am so blessed to have been born in a country where we have little (to no) worry of a world war taking place on our soil. I am so blessed, as a female, to have been able to earn a college education. I am so blessed to have the right to express myself through my clothing and hairstyle (regardless of how un-edgy it may be, haha). I am so blessed to be able to access the internet and have the opportunity to blog about my freedoms right at this very moment.

 I am about to go get into a car to go to the library to return a book & then to the post office to drop off a letter, and for that I know I am also so very blessed.

Never will we have enough thanks for the people, both past and present, that have made this all happen. The soldiers, the [good] politicians, the citizens that have joined together to create change.

With it being Veteran's Day, I want to give a special thanks to the military men and women around the world that put in hard work and long hours in order for us to be able to go about our daily lives with all the freedoms that we have. Years ago I signed up to be a pen pal through a military pen pal program (Soldiers Angels) and I could not thank those young men and women enough for all that they have done, not to mention all they had given up in order to serve our country across seas. I feel honored to have been able to cross paths with these courageous people, as well as having relatives that have also stood up to the challenge. Today, and other days, I think of you guys and feel forever grateful to have known such amazing people.

With love, xo, Kaila

Questions

As many of my friends know, I am fascinated in learning about other peoples cultures, backgrounds, stories, etc. I believe each and every person has some type of story/experience/knowledge to share that will enrich and enhance the minds of others. How often do we encounter the same people on a regular basis but yet we never stop to learn something about them? This person could be the FedEx guy that drops packages at your office building each morning or the barista that you see every other time you go get your Saturday Starbucks. Why don't we take the time to get to know them on a first name basis? It doesn't take much, you don't have to spend an hour talking to them about their favorite movie, but why not take the time [and it doesn't take much] to create some type of relationship with them. It doesn't mean you have to become friends with them and hang out with them on the weekends but by simply addressing someone by their first name creates a completely different kind of experience for the both of you. You never know what you can learn for someone.
I have been going to the same hairdresser for over a year now. I had wanted to try a new salon so one day I went to the mall and decided to try out one of the salons there. The woman that cut my hair that day had a thick accent, but I wasn't too sure where it was from. I thought that it was either an island accent or an some type of African accent. I ended up loving how she cut my hair that day and have continued to go back to her ever since. This past June she texted all of her clients saying that she was 'going back home' for a month due to her dad passing away. I still did not know where she was from because I had yet to ask her. Every time I went to to get my haircut I wanted to ask because I was curious, but I just never did. We would talk a little, but usually the background noises at the salon were loud enough that if our conversation trickled off it didn't seem awkward.
Two weeks ago I was in dire need of a haircut. I contacted Joyce and she said that she could cut my hair at her cousins house the following day. Since she was cutting my hair in a home the environment was completely different. It was just me and her without the noises of other people bustling around us. I couldn't get away with being shy and not making conversation this time. Since I was so curious about where she was from I finally asked. She let out a half laugh/half sigh and said "Liberia... you know the one that is all over the news right now." She went on to tell me that every time she sees a news segment on Ebola she worries about her family that still resides in Liberia. Every time she calls her mom she is scared that she is going to hear bad news. Thankfully, her family lives on the opposite side of the country from where the outbreak is. Hearing her tell me this was so eye opening to me. Obviously Ebola, along with other diseases/social issues/etc, are real things that have real effects, but they don't really become real  to us until someone we know or we ourselves are faced with it.
Joyce has two siblings that have also moved out of Liberia. She has a brother that also lives in America and a sister that I believe lives in Europe. Joyce came over to America 12 years ago with her dad. Her dad was a pastor in Liberia and would come to the US for conferences. In 2002 Joyce joined him on one of his conference trips. Unfortunately, while they were here war had broken out and their return flight had been canceled. They were temporarily stuck in America. Her brother who already lived here, offered to file paperwork for Joyce to become a US citizen. She decided to do it and eventually her dad returned to Africa while she stayed. After he dad passed away (not from Ebola, for the record) her and her siblings tried convincing her mother to move to America. Her mother refused to live her 'children' though.... yes, you heard that right. Joyce's mom has 45 children that depend on her. These children are the orphans that are a part of the ministry that Joyce's mother and father had built on their property. The story of how they started their orphanage is absolutely fascinating as well as heartbreaking yet also heartwarming all at the same time.
Back in 1989 a civil war in Liberia broke out. Joyce, who was 12 at the time, and her family lived in the capital. By the time the war reached the capital it was 1990. It was a day like any other, parents woke up and went to work while children ventured off to school. No one knew that the rebels were going to attack their city that day, but unfortunately it happened while families were in separate places, all spread out doing their daily routines. When the rebels came they ordered people to leave the city and go to other places. Some people were sent north, others east, etc etc. Since parents were at work and children were at school many families were split up and sent in opposite directions. The rebels threatened that if they tried to go find their family, they were at risk of being killed. Thankfully on that day Joyce, her siblings, and her parents were all at home. They set out to the camp that they were ordered to go to. As they were walking down the street they saw a child in their school uniform crying on the corner because they could not find their parents. Joyce's mom and dad knew that they could not leave this child to fend for themselves so they told the child to join them. They walked a little further and came across more and more children who were confused and parent-less. By the time they reached the camp, Joyce's parents had 60 extra children with them. Joyce's father had to figure out how he was going to feed them all and how they were going to take care of them while in camp. Somehow they made it work and when they were able to return to their city months later all the children made the journey back with them. Some of the children's parents also made it back to the city from wherever they had been stationed at. Those children returned to their parents, happily reunited. Unfortunately, there were children whose parents were never going to show up... and that is when Joyce's mother knew that they had to build a ministry and continue to care for these children that she had grown to love as her own. Over the years Joyce's parents have cared for many orphaned children.
When Joyce went back to Liberia for her fathers funeral she said the amount of people that showed up was overwhelming. Among her fathers church parishioners there was also the children that they had taken care of over the years. They showed up to his funeral with their own families, wives and kids of their very own. How powerful would that be to see? These adults with their own families who were once children left without a family. Not only is that fascinating, but the way that Joyce told this story was as well. She told it so casually, as if people just do these types of things and live through these types of experiences. I kept asking more and more questions because I was so intrigued, and I kept finding more and more out. At first she had just told me that her mom ran in orphanage but I would have never known the whole background story if I hadn't keep inquiring about the orphanage. I am so happy that I did continue to ask questions because not only did I learn so much about someone I see regularly, but I also got a mini unintentional history lesson.
Hearing Joyce's (and her family's) story was so powerful. It made me realize once again how good I have it. I don't have to worry about a civil war breaking out anytime soon, nor do I have to worry about catching Ebola on a daily basis (among many, many other others). It also made me step back and question what have I accomplished in my life?! Here you have people taking responsibility for other humans without even second guessing themselves. They just knew what they had to do, and they did it, phenomenally. Although opening up an orphanage isn't in my plans, I do hope that one day I will have an interesting story of my own that is even half as touching as this one.

xoxo,
Kaila

New Beginnings?

ATTENTION: I began writing this post the week of my birthday and left it sit for months without finishing it. So although it sounds like my birthday is coming up, it really was nearly 4 months ago. Oops. 


Yesterday I went to pick up my prescription from the pharmacy and as protocol they make you confirm your name and birth date. As I said my birthday aloud, I thought to myself --Oh my god, my birthday is in less than a week! When did that happen??--
As we grow older birthday's become less... exciting? important? celebrated?
I guess maybe not for everyone, but it seems to be a common trend among me and my close friends. Not saying that birthdays are completely forgotten about or go uncelebrated, but they just don't have the same type of excitement and recognition as when you were younger (& by younger I mean every year up through your college years). Don't get me wrong, I'm not whining about it and I don't expect some huge party thrown in my name, I'm simply just observing the way things seem to change. Instead of making a big deal out of every year it becomes every year that ends in '5' or '0'... and then it turns into just the years ending in '0', but if you are lucky enough to live for many, many years people will again start celebrating the years that end in '5', and if you live to be very, very old [think 93,94, etc.] you might even get big celebrations every year again. Interesting how that works, isn't it?

As we all know, January 1st is the start of a new calendar year. That is when we set out to accomplish the goals we have chosen to conquer over the next 365 days. We view new calendar years as a blank slate, a clear board, that we can design and fill with whatever we choose. For example, I did just this when I made my list of 15 by '15. I made a list of fifteen things I was determined to complete by the time January 1st came around again. Now, being nearly half way through the year, I should have about half the list complete..right? Well, I don't. Looking back and reading over what I set out to accomplish I realize that I will probably fail at completing my list. I won't be able to accomplish all fifteen of the things I wanted to, whether the reason be time, money, or I simply lost interest in what I once wanted to do (just a mere 10 months ago).

Many of us give ourselves a second opportunity each year to look at the future with clear eyes and full hearts. With that day being our birthday. Some people post on social media something along the lines of "I don't know about you, but i'm feeling 22!...excited to see what this next year has to offer" while others may be thinking similar thoughts, but just not posting it on the internet. I wouldn't say I necessarily make goals for the next year in age that I am, but I do sometimes wonder how I will look back on that year of life. For example, how people say "I think 19 was the best year" [or whatever age you believe to be true for you].

It's interesting really how we use the term year when referring to not only calendar years but birthday years as well. We can say '2012 was the best year of my life thus far' or '21 was the best year of my life thus far'. I think it's important to celebrate and recognize both of these new years. I'm not saying you need to make to-do lists or set goals each time these milestones come around... that isn't for everyone, but for some people it works. It is important to feel rejuvenated for the future as well as being able to reflect on all the amazing things [and not so amazing things] that have occurred in the past.

--Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose--
xo, Kaila